Debi, Ginger and a Word from God

Debi loves quilting and specializes in making “baby quilts”. When friends (and now the children of friends) have babies, Debi will find out as much as she can about the expectant parent’s colors and decorating tastes and she then makes a quilt for their infant. It can be a powerful gift as evidenced by a couple of our own kids who still sleep with the now tattered remnants of their own baby quilts.

Recently, Debi was making a quilt for an expectant mother. As she was working on the quilt, God said to her, “Stop making this quilt and make a quilt for Ginger.”

Now Ginger is the daughter of one of Debi’s college roommates – a roommate who became a lifelong friend. Ginger has wanted children for some time but has been struggling with fertility issues.

Knowing this, Debi did what I would have done with this word from God – she ignored it. After all, on a human level, this seems cruel! God could not possibly be telling her to make a quilt for a young woman who was battling depression and despair over her inability to conceive.

But this word from God persisted and one day God said, “Make a quilt for Ginger and tell her that it is a hope quilt.”

So Debi suspended work on the quilt she had begun and made one for Ginger and mailed it to her. I’ll let Ginger pick up the story from there as told in an email that she sent to Debi and a group of friends a few days after receiving the quilt:

“We are writing with some amazing news. On Friday, we got a call from our lawyer letting us know that we had been matched with a birth mother!!! We got to talk to her later that night on the phone, and she asked us if we would adopt the baby...of course we were thrilled to say YES!


The incredible story of this baby started in earnest the day before we got the call. Thursday afternoon we had a package on our front porch from a dear family friend who makes quilts for her friends’ babies and grandbabies. I was surprised when I saw her name on the package as we don't usually get mail from her. In the top of the package was a card that read, in part: ‘While minding my own business, God told me to make this quilt for your first baby. Since I do not often hear from God like this I did not start right away. He spoke again - this time I did what He told me to do. He said this is to be your ‘'hope quilt.'’ She then mentioned her own fertility struggles years ago before starting a family. She ended the card by saying, ‘What I learned is that God is faithful even though I am not and that His grace is enough for me...I believe that you will find hope now and a little one soon.’ Under the tissue paper was a soft, wonderful quilt for our little one.


I wept after reading half of the first sentence...and continued weeping tears of joy for about two hours after. Somehow, in that first sentence, it felt like something pierced right through to my heart. I cried in complete awe at the love of God. Who is this God that loves us enough to have asked this woman miles away from us to make a quilt for our baby? It also brought me back to the center of the Reality that He is so far ahead of us here...this is not all up to us. He knows who our baby is and when they will be born. I have never felt so loved by God. Our dear friend who sent this blanket truly stepped out in faith...I mean, the prospect of making and sending a baby quilt to a couple who's struggled with fertility issues for some time and has no baby in sight is not exactly an appealing one, especially for someone who has been down that road and knows how painful it is … I will never forget those moments and hours of feeling so overwhelmed by the love of God...for us and for our baby. It's amazing!


22 hours after receiving our hope quilt, I got a call from the law firm saying we'd been chosen by a birth mom! Our hearts were prepared to receive that news in SUCH a different way because of that amazing gift the day before. We are keenly aware of how much the Lord loves us and has a plan for us and our family. Regardless of what happens, we know this to be true.”

I’m reading between the lines a bit but it sure seems like Ginger had been caught up (understandably) in the struggle that usually accompanies trauma and suffering. Where is God? Has he abandoned me? Is he angry with me? Does he even exist? What have I done to deserve this? Why is He not coming through for me when what I want is such a good and normal thing? And, of course, when you are in your 20s and married, a lot of your friends are in their 20s and married and they all seem to be getting pregnant by just looking cross-eyed at each other. These circumstances conspire to exacerbate the problem even further. In addition, the Evil One is always there and ready to add fuel to the fire of doubt and despair created by these questions and circumstances.

What Ginger needed was a word from God – not just a biblical principle about God’s love or sovereignty – but an actual communication from God related to what she was going through. She needed the kind of thing you find all through the Bible where God speaks to people about the circumstances of their lives. How many stories can you think of off the top of your head where God sends messages to barren women about children?

If you’re a frequent reader of this blog, you know that this “hearing from God” experience is a very new thing for me and Debi. We spent 30+ years of our Christian lives as de-facto naturalists. We said we believed in the supernatural but tended to be suspicious of any actual manifestation of it. Thankfully, experiences like the one with Ginger and the quilt are changing our perspective. God still wants to speak to us about the circumstances of our lives just like we see throughout the biblical record.

A postscript --

I’m painfully aware that other women who are struggling with fertility issues might read this and find it massively depressing. Why has God come through for Ginger and not for you? Debi and I know from personal experience how painful it is to want children while being surrounded by those who are accomplishing this task easily. At your best, you’re not unhappy for them even though it does make you more miserable – at your worst, you resent their “success”.


Well I certainly don’t want this story to add to peoples’ pain. While I’m sure God always wants to speak to us in our struggles, I’m also convinced that any kind of pain and suffering and evil involves the bigger question of why these things even exist in a world created by a good and all-powerful God. Addressing the question of suffering is certainly beyond the scope of this current posting. However, if you’ve been the victim of evil or suffering, I can recommend a book by Greg Boyd entitled Is God to Blame? Moving Beyond Pat Answers to the Problem of Evil. I’ve found it immensely helpful in my own struggles with this issue.